10 things he’s thinking when you’re naked
Find out what he really thinks when you're naked. You might be surprised…
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It's a cliché for a reason - your skin does feel like satin to him. A man's skin is around 20% thicker than a woman's, so even if you think your skin feels rough, to him it's like creamy silk. Men tend to have more oily skin than women too - so when his hand glides across your body, it doesn't get stuck, adding to that super-smooth sensation.
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Lay off the lotions and potions and he's far more likely to want to nuzzle curvy corner of your body. "Covering up your natural smell with excessive washing and perfuming won't do you any favours in the bedroom," says relationship expert Dr Pam Spurr, (drpam.co.uk). "Your natural pheromones are like an aphrodisiac to him, so why try to get rid of them? Being clean is preferable, obviously, but use a gently scented shower lotion and moisturiser and leave it at that. That way he won't feel like he's got a mouthful of soap."
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According to a Psychology Today survey 56% of women are unhappy with their appearance. Can it be that more than half of all women are unattractive? Not likely. "More likely is that a lot of women have unrealistic self-images," says Spurr. "They look in the mirror and see only their faults. That's not how a man sees a woman, quite the reverse."
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Even with the skills and experience of a modern-day Don Juan, he's still clueless as to what you'll like, so tell him. "I can't stress enough how much men like guidance," says sex therapist Dr Ian Kerner, author of Passionista: the empowered woman's guide to pleasuring man. "Everything is so much easier with good instructions and being told what feels good can be incredibly sexy too."
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You might think you need to lose some weight, you might even think he does too but regardless, he thinks you both look great. According to the Psychology Today survey, 63% of men would like to lose some weight, but despite that they didn't necessarily rate themselves as less attractive - 25% of overweight men rated themselves as 'very attractive'. "Women place more importance on weight as a factor in how attractive they and others are," says Spurr. "But it really isn't a big deal for men. Be weight aware by all means to ensure you keep healthy and fit, but know that the man you're with genuinely thinks you're drop-dead sexy just as you are."
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Women have an extra layer of fat under their skin and it makes you feel softer all over. "That difference is why he loves to touch your breasts, your bum and yes, your belly," says Kerner. "Try to relax about it and enjoy him enjoying your fleshy parts - it's what makes you attractive to him!"
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Men take great pride in giving you your big O. The thing that's at the forefront of his mind when he sees you naked is that he wants to make the experience fantastic for you... because then he gets to see you naked all over again!
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To him, your breasts feel as though they're designed to be grabbed and massaged - like two gigantic stress balls. He has no idea how sensitive they are because, well, he hasn't got a pair himself (we hope!). "The problem with breast fondling is that sometimes women enjoy a bit of man-handling," says Kerner. "At other times women crave a featherlight touch - it's difficult for a man to know which it is." Which is why you need to set the scene early on. "If you're feeling raunchy, show him with your kisses - make them firmer and grab his shoulders; if you're after more romantic love-making, kiss him softly, gently caress his skin. Most men will pick up on these signals."
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Those names might not mean much to you but if he's an Arsenal fan these are the names he's probably reciting as he tries desperately not to reach climax too soon. "Guys have all kinds of strange methods to delay orgasm," says Kerner. So how can you make it easier for him? "If he does orgasm a little too soon, show him how to take you to climax with his hands or mouth," says Kerner. "There's no need for you to miss out just because he was too quick to the finishing line." Everyone's a winner.
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You'd think, what with all the media attention the clitoris has had, that a man would find it easily. But even if you drew a man a map, if he was with a new woman he still might not be able to find it. Why? "Because each one is different in size, colour, shape and exact location," says Kerner. Some protrude making them easier to find, others are shy and only come out when you're aroused, and still others never seem to be fully visible. "Give the guy a hand," adds Kerner. "If he's fumbling around, take his hand and guide him." If you don't, the only person really losing out is you.
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